This week has been an intense Struggle! I don't hardly know where to start, and really don't want to recount all of it. I have been so exhausted, consumed, and one night simply just refused to come home and face the problems! I haven't written here all week, and in fact locked the whole page private on Friday as I felt attacked, and ridiculed on every front! I should be allowed private space, and so I claimed this as private space!
Tonight I want to record miracles worked by the Hand of God for me today...
A date with Brad last night even after the 3+ hour meeting with R and the PAX rep regarding the PG-13 problems.
Two listening ears - Bro T. and Bis regarding our frustrations at church today!
A meeting organized by them with the stake leaders tonight with a completely different purpose, but I know it was simply for me - personal guidance from even a higher level!
A call from a friend MM tonight just when I thought I couldn't deal with the next step!
A beautiful family who dares to stand when all the world is laughing!
A testimony of the creation of the world, the presentations of the plans in heaven, our participation there, and our desire to come here and have our chance to learn.
I am grateful tonight for a spouse to stand next to. After not coming home on Thursday night, concerned about relations there, I am so grateful to stand together! Thank you B. I am sorry I wasn't more patient! I am so grateful I don't really have to stand alone!xoxoxo
I am grateful J is safe and healthy! He won last night (by a lot!), and I am so grateful!
I have so much to be grateful for.
Nonetheless, the fiery darts have been flying in EVERY direction all week! My children have woken up so scared, they had to raise their arm to the square (two of them have). I didn't come home one night, upset and without a way through! Problems larger than life! I don't know how, but tonight we feel a sense of hope. A glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. We are saddened by the decisions tonight, but we feel we supported agency, and now the consequences of agency will be dished out. So be it!
Thought from yesterday while we worked in the yard and someone else sat in the bedroom.... "Who does God's work will get God's pay, no matter how long will be the day!" I testify that we enjoy an abundance! We also are "a marked generation!" Our lives have been locked in for fire in the machine guns of the adversary and we better be prepared on every front! We have been attacked from the inside! The talk about the Book of Mormon leader who was called down four times and wouldn't come, but then finally he came down, and that mistake proved to be his downfall. We feel we have been tested, tested, tested, and tested again! To the point of going to the B's office today questioning, do we keep fighting this battle, or are we wrong? He confirmed that "No, You aren't wrong! You should keep your standard's high!" Ok then, why do we stand alone all the time! Wow! Decisions tonight will affect the rest of our lives as well as hers! L is a bit upset about it. Her nickname is Miss Kindheart! She is kind and accepting, and loving. I am not so, I tend to see in black and white, not something that is always friendly or popular!
As L pointed out "Whose on the Lord's side who? Now is the time to show... "
It is the time to show, and we have even been forced to fire our guns this week! Shield's have not been effective enough! I am grateful for many parts of my armor!
Tonight I want to record miracles worked by the Hand of God for me today...
A date with Brad last night even after the 3+ hour meeting with R and the PAX rep regarding the PG-13 problems.
Two listening ears - Bro T. and Bis regarding our frustrations at church today!
A meeting organized by them with the stake leaders tonight with a completely different purpose, but I know it was simply for me - personal guidance from even a higher level!
A call from a friend MM tonight just when I thought I couldn't deal with the next step!
A beautiful family who dares to stand when all the world is laughing!
A testimony of the creation of the world, the presentations of the plans in heaven, our participation there, and our desire to come here and have our chance to learn.
I am grateful tonight for a spouse to stand next to. After not coming home on Thursday night, concerned about relations there, I am so grateful to stand together! Thank you B. I am sorry I wasn't more patient! I am so grateful I don't really have to stand alone!xoxoxo
I am grateful J is safe and healthy! He won last night (by a lot!), and I am so grateful!
I have so much to be grateful for.
Nonetheless, the fiery darts have been flying in EVERY direction all week! My children have woken up so scared, they had to raise their arm to the square (two of them have). I didn't come home one night, upset and without a way through! Problems larger than life! I don't know how, but tonight we feel a sense of hope. A glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. We are saddened by the decisions tonight, but we feel we supported agency, and now the consequences of agency will be dished out. So be it!
Thought from yesterday while we worked in the yard and someone else sat in the bedroom.... "Who does God's work will get God's pay, no matter how long will be the day!" I testify that we enjoy an abundance! We also are "a marked generation!" Our lives have been locked in for fire in the machine guns of the adversary and we better be prepared on every front! We have been attacked from the inside! The talk about the Book of Mormon leader who was called down four times and wouldn't come, but then finally he came down, and that mistake proved to be his downfall. We feel we have been tested, tested, tested, and tested again! To the point of going to the B's office today questioning, do we keep fighting this battle, or are we wrong? He confirmed that "No, You aren't wrong! You should keep your standard's high!" Ok then, why do we stand alone all the time! Wow! Decisions tonight will affect the rest of our lives as well as hers! L is a bit upset about it. Her nickname is Miss Kindheart! She is kind and accepting, and loving. I am not so, I tend to see in black and white, not something that is always friendly or popular!
As L pointed out "Whose on the Lord's side who? Now is the time to show... "
It is the time to show, and we have even been forced to fire our guns this week! Shield's have not been effective enough! I am grateful for many parts of my armor!